The Navel of the World

kirby

The moon reflected off the lake, creating a specter of double light. Alli turned around and watched ripples float away from the opposite shore. In one hand, she held a cast-iron pot full of water, collected from the pump down the hill.

Even at night, the entire woods exhaled. Alli breathed in the sharp, minty smell of pine needles. Acorns lay underfoot. Clouds scraped the sky, silently passing each other in the night.

Alli let the cool air fall over her, like a blanket. She hiked through the dull-colored underbrush back up to the cabin. Candlelight was visible through the windows. She walked up the steps and brushed off her shoes on the welcome mat. Inside, Xen was feeding the fire in the stove with twigs.

The pot of water went on the stove and Alli sat down on the lower bunk bed, to better pull off her all-terrain boots. Kaan lit the large myrrh and frankincense candle on a wrought-iron candlestick, and they all gathered around, sitting cross-legged on the floor.

Xen got up and extinguished all the other candles in the cabin. She also took a piece of chalk out of her sweater pocket and drew a circle around them. The three of them crossed their arms also and held hands around the circle.

Alli inhaled the incense. The cabin fell away bit by bit. She felt freezing air on the nape of her neck. She was in a heavy parka, with a fur-trimmed hood, and wore Inuit snow goggles to block out the glare of the midnight sun. Walking on the ice floe, in a white suit and pants, was Aro.

“Is your Inner Space always cold like this?” Alli asked, clapping her gloved hands together to generate heat.

“No,” said Aro, “I am speaking to Kaan at our old seaside cabana. I am speaking to Xen in a Starbucks.”

“Lucky them,” Alli laughed.

They watched the plates of ice, shift and crack over the water. The barren bricolage stretched into the distance.

“What should I do?” Alli asked. Her voice came out as a whisper, nearly a soundless puff of condensation.

“Do you like Xen?” Aro asked. The wind swirled around, picking up snow, that was merely frozen dust.

“Of course!” Alli exclaimed, but her heart sunk a little lower.

“You’re holding back,” Aro said. She snapped her fingers, and they were standing in a sea of stars, that continued forever. Above them, the constellations winked in the heavens.

“I can’t shake this feeling that I’m making a mistake,” Alli murmured.

A green light appeared, twinkling on the horizon. It drew closer, as the waves passed their ankles, until a barrel of green fire was right in front of them.

Aro turned to her, “Do you even know what you are giving up?”

Alli’s eyes widened. She shook her head, “No.”

Aro turned back to the fire; it seemed to leap higher with every second. With an inhuman jump, she carried herself into the flame. Her shell disintegrated into flying embers, and only an ever larger, growing afterimage of smoke was left.

Aro, now also made of green flame, with an aura at least ten feet high, spoke to Alli from the sky, “A tulpa is on your back. Its feet are around your torso, and like a monkey, its hands are grasping your head. You must let go of this thing that you are carrying around.”

Alli looked down from Aro, to the barrel of green flame which she had risen from, like a djinn set free from a thousand-year slumber.

She took a running leap and cleared the lip of the barrel with ease. She jumped into a blinding, white light.

Alli awoke in the darkened cabin. The incense candle had burned down and gone out, leaving a twisted wick. The other two were asleep, heads tucked into their chests. Everyone was still holding hands.

She let go and stood up, stretching her legs. The others slumbered on. Alli left the circle and re-lit one of the candles in the window. In the gloom, beyond the reflected orb of candlelight, Alli thought, for a moment, that she could see Nealy’s face.

U F O

Songs

BACKWHEN – Miami

waterfront dining – can’t

Infinity Frequencies – Y8U & ME

All of Everything

moving on

Xen and Alli walked down the boardwalk. The beach ran parallel to them. The street fair was in full swing. Venders were selling cotton candy and huge, warm pretzels. Lights were strung up, all along the thoroughfare. People strolled and strode the length of the promenade. The night brought a much-needed respite from the day’s summer heat.

They sat down on a bench under a large tree. Paper lanterns hung from a few lower branches. Xen put her hand in Alli’s. Her hair floated briefly in the night’s first breeze. Alli could hear the waves lapping greedily at the shore, before receding and heading back out into the bay.

“So, you’re going to stay in New York?” Xen asked.

Alli nodded, “I am going to open up a restaurant.”

“What kind of restaurant?” Xen wondered.

“Italian-Asian fusion,” Alli joked.

“I’m serious!” Xen said.

Alli looked up. A shadow had crossed their path. Nealy was blocking the street lamp light.

“Oh hi, I didn’t see you two there!” Nealy said, “How are you?”

Xen and Alli got up. Alli shook Nealy’s hand and hugged her. She turned to Xen, “Xen, this is Nealy. Nealy, this is Xen.”

“A pleasure to meet you,” Nealy said.

“No, really,” Xen laughed, “The pleasure is mine.”

Nealy, looked between them, “How did you two meet?”

Alli hooked her thumbs in her belt loops, “Oh, you know – Labyrinth.”

“Ah yes,” Nealy chuckled, “The old watering hole.”

“Do you want to grab a coffee with us?” Xen added “I’d love to learn more about you. Alli speaks highly of you.”

Nealy smiled, bemused, “She does? Well, look, I just got off from work, so I could use a bite to eat.”

A taxi ride later, they all sat in Costa Coffee, drinking a round of dirty chai.

“What do you do for a living?” Nealy asked Xen.

“I manage restaurants, like Nobu and Noma,” Xen said, sipping her tea.

“What an amazing job,” Nealy said. Turning to Alli, she said, “And you just ran into her at Labyrinth?”

“It was a rainy day. The clientele must have been different,” Alli shrugged.

“And what happens next?” Nealy said, with a bit of mischief.

Xen and Alli looked at each other. “I don’t know,” Alli laughed.

Xen also laughed, “I was telling her about my cabin upstate.”

“A magic cabin,” Nealy grinned.

“Well, summer isn’t going to last forever,” Alli said.

“You’re welcome to come too, Nealy,” Xen said.

“I will consider it,” Nealy said, getting up, “Especially, if there’s barbeque.”

They caught separate taxis, Xen and Alli, headed to Alli’s apartment in Midtown, and Nealy, heading home, to Williamsburg.

“See you around Nealy,” Xen said, “Great to meet you!”

“We have to catch up some time,” Alli said, opening the taxi door for Xen.

“Of course!” Nealy said, getting in her cab, “Just text me.”

As Nealy’s taxi pulled away, Alli couldn’t help feeling a pang of guilt. But she pushed the sadness down below, into her gut. She walked around the car, to her door.

when i am home

Songs

コンシャスTHOUGHTS:

All night (feat. ローマン Roman)

BACKWHEN:

Dynasty (feat. Watermane)